Heavy Heart


Little discoveries brought to you by my heavy heart (note: not broken). My friend and I ended up at this courtyard which was formerly the military families village. 

I've been overly dramatic lately. Well not that I bawl my eyes at every given situation, but my heart feels very very heavy. My hormones are out of whack, so maybe that's partly to blame. However, there are some issues that need to be sorted out.

You see, these are the times when I want to book the next flight to Manila and just hop on the plane, never mind my job. There really are things I want  to change, but I have no control over them.

Sorry for being too vague, I still do not have the courage to pour what's in the depths of my heart, of what I truly feel. But I'm disappointed at how things are, of late. I'm certain God hears my prayers, and someday He'll light the way.

I know cannot just sulk and wallow in self pity.I remember my Mandarin language teacher telling me that we are not supposed to feel bad about our lives, to pity ourselves. We should take it as an opportunity to improve, to work hard and make ourselves better individuals. These words have since been etched at the back of my hand, kept inside my heart.

I try to let go of all these emotions when I'm at work, and replace all negativity with smile and optimism. I appreciate the presence of friends- conversations over afternoon tea dates. Last Saturday, my friend and I went out for our long-overdue tea date. It was pouring hard so we hailed a cab at the City Hall station, gave the address to the driver and found ourselves at an old courtyard. There seems to be no coffee-tea shop place here, I thought to myself. The driver must have heard my thoughts and told us we have to walk over the courtyard, and we'll see the coffee-shop right across. The location was just too pretty, we learned that it was formerly the military families village. Ah, what discoveries my heavy heart can bring.

I also shared this bowl of fresh mangoes-strawberries-mochies shaved ice last night with a good friend. It did help a bit :)

Lighten up, my heavy heart.

11 comments

Angel E. said...

cheer up girl! everything will be okay. :)

Jacqueline said...

Thank you, Angel :)

Mel May said...

Whatever it is sis, kaya yan :)

Kristine Diomampo said...

Woho! That shaved ice dessert will definitely lighten my heavy heart but will not do anything to lighten my weight. :D

As someone also going through something right now, I feel you. I don't know what exactly it is you're going through but I'm positive you'll make it out stronger. I read this quote somewhere in the past week:

"If you're going through hell, keep going..."

So just keep going sister! And stay pretty while you're at it. Mahirap na ngang may pinagdadaanan na nga, haggard pa ang peg. Fighting! :D

Jing Kolca said...

Cheer up my dear! Life's like that. We each have our own share of ups and downs, but whatever it is, always stay close to your friends and family members. Don't distant yourself from them. Hugs*

JhAnEy said...

As they say, when things around us are getting negative, a good company from a friend and a nice dessert will do. Stay positive sis. ;)

Sheryl Burwell said...

That's the spirit! I've been going through a few personal challenges myself, and for some reason the Byrd's song "Turn! Turn! Turn!" kept playing in my head. I had just visited your blog and what do you know? Those are the exact same lyrics under your profile picture. :)

Nathalie said...

Sharing yummy dessert with a friend will definitely lighten up a heavy heart, even for just a short time. :)

Hope you're doing better!

Jacqueline said...

Thank you, all, for the words of encouragement :)

Jean Quiambao said...

Hi Jackie! :) Whatever that is, I hope you'll overcome it in the days to come. I feel you, I've been contemplating on a lot of things lately and it can be a little depressing and frustrating most of the times; like you just wanted to tell the whole world what you really feel but something is holding you back. And that's really hard. Take your time and be easy on yourself. And hey, I know you probably have a lot of friends you can talk to, but if ever you need another soul, I'm willing to listen, just drop me an email. :) I hope you're feeling better these days! *HUG*

Jacqueline Uy said...

Hi, Jean :) Thank you for this very uplifting message! This blog is a great help for somewhat telling the whole world of what I feel deep down :) I'm okay now! Must be hormones hahaha :)