Birthday Blues

Blah- the only apt word I can think of to describe how I'm feeling the past days. Blame it on the so-called "birthday blues" or to the lonesome anticipation of adding a year to your age, and later on realizing you still haven't gone too far in your twenty something years of existence.

So I'm 24 and nine days old. I shiver at the thought of tick-tocking time, I'm nowhere near that vision I have of myself. But fine. I always try to bang my head onto the wall and remind myself of enjoying the present. After all, the present is the only thing I can hold on to. At this stage, or should I say, ''age,'' maturity speaks in such a way that every minute of my life is already something to be thankful for. I have stopped complaining over silly little things and have learned the values of gratuity and appreciation.

I don't know what else I should write about in this supposed-to-be birthday entry. I did nothing to celebrate, but I feel grateful for having people around me who remembered and made me feel loved and special, even for just a day out of 365 days. If there is something that saves me from insanity here, it is the group of people I am with every day for the last three years. Even if I have a lot to think about at night when I turn off the lights, I am still happy as to how life has been treating me. Sure it is far from perfect, million miles away from what I have envisioned, but as they say, life is not worth living if we do not go through rough times and learn from them. And having people to be with you, rough times or not, is already a joy.

I want to write more but I'm uninspired to do so. I feel uninspired to do anything- clean, do the laundry, head to the grocery, or even read. I have been downing antibiotics and other meds for my strep throat and nasty cough hoping I get better soon. The whole day was just spent in bed, napping, sipping soup like a sick little girl, hence the lack of inspiration. But yes, I had a happy birthday.



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